Flowers For a Ghost (I Will Love You For Eternity)
by poke-a-spark
Summary: Byleth expresses her emotions through the use of flowers. [Female!Avatar Byleth/Rhea][Angst][Fluff][Spoilers][SilverSnow]


**Flowers For a Ghost (_I Will Love You For Eternity_)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem, or anything associated with it. This story was wrotten for my own amusement; nothing more, nothing less.**

**0o0o0o0**

Byleth wasn't certain how long she knelt alone in the monastery's small graveyard, green eyes unseeingly staring up at the streaks of pinks and oranges painting the once-blue sky. Her usual blank expression nowhere to be seen, an uncharacteristically solemn frown tugged at her lips as she absently twirled a flower stem between finger and thumb. It took a moment of contemplation before she was able to recall just how she had come to be in that position, her thoughts many and scattered.

A vague urge had her rising earlier than usual, and after an apple and an hour of careful consideration at the greenhouse, she had knelt before the unassuming tombstone just shy of noon.

She hadn't moved since.

A cool breeze caught her unruly green hair in its grip and caused the pale strands to dance across her face. Tilting her head slightly, Byleth took in a deep breath of the brisk air, held it for a moment, then let it out tiredly. Her fingers stilling, her eyes finally stopped searching the past and came back to the present in time to see the last of the sun's rays begin its slow dip below the horizon.

The oranges were now pinks, and the pinks quickly fading to a dark purple. Soon what light remained would be quenched, the coming darkness only broken by the brilliantly shining stars that dotted the night sky.

She was running out of time.

_Time_.

A melancholy smile twisted Byleth's lips. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply once more before exhaling in a resigned sigh. Eyes opening, green orbs trailed across the words carved into the stone before her before catching on a single name.

_Jeralt_.

Her time spent at the greenhouse had been fruitful with the chief gardener's aid. An offhand comment had her forgoing most of the flowers that had caught her eye in favor of a selection with more symbolism; an easier way to display the exact emotions she was hoping to express.

Her hand gently deposited the flower she'd been idly twirling against the rough stone, fingers briefly brushing against the carved name before returning to her lap. Her father had been a man of many qualities, but extravagance was never one of them. And so, for the only family she had known for most of her life, she left a single pink carnation.

_I'll never forget you._

She stared at the flower for a long moment before shifting her gaze slightly to the side. There lay another flower, this time a blue colored salvia. Though she had never met the woman, she had idly wondered more than once what it would have been like to have a mother. Though that role had been filled - if however briefly - by another, Byleth remembered her father mentioning that the woman who gave birth to her had loved flowers.

_I think of you._

Stiffly, Byleth rose to her feet. She gave the double grave one last lingering look before grabbing the basket nestled in the grass and walking around the tombstone. She spied a hint of green hair – a few shades darker than her own – out of the corner of her eyes, but her watcher was silent and so she didn't comment.

Stopping at the ledge, Byleth took a moment to gaze out over her surroundings. The sound of war and steel echoing in her mind even as she took in the peaceful landscape. Reaching into the basket, she withdrew a large bouquet of daisy-like flowers that the gardener had informed her were called zinnia and symbolised '_thinking of absent friends_'. The blooms were varied in personality and of a multitude of colors, much like those she had come to call friend.

Her thoughts of those she had lost to the war shifted to those who were now parted by distance and circumstance. Not all her students - her _friends_ \- were as fortunate as her to be able to continue living on a mostly permanent basis at Garreg Mach. Many of her remaining students had returned to their respective homes in a bid to further cement the peace they had fought for.

Still - parted by something as trivial as distance, or as finite as death, she thought of them.

Unraveling the ribbon holding the bouquet together, Byleth held her hand out over the ledge and uncurled her fingers. Her small smile was bittersweet as she watched the wind carry away the flowers in a rainbow flurry of petals.

Byleth waited until the last of the petals was out of her sight before reaching her hand into the nearly empty basket. Almost hesitantly, she pulled out a small bouquet of deep crimson roses surrounding a solitary purple hyacinth. The flowers were tied together by a silken white ribbon steeped in memories.

Byleth's eyes clouded, her slight smile fading as her expression blatantly showed deep sorrow for all to see. Thoughts swirled in her mind; memories and regrets threatened to drown her, and it was all that she could do to keep afloat.

A hand softly touching her bare arm caused her to blink slowly, and by the time a warm cloak was wrapped around her shoulders followed by the comforting familiarity of a warm body at her back, Byleth was able to pull herself from the turbulent memories.

"You have been out here for hours, dear one."

Rhea's softly voiced words broke the silence, but Byleth found she didn't mind. A gentle hand wrapped loosely around her wrist, thumb carefully avoiding the flowers clenched in her hand as it rubbed soothing circles along the base of her palm.

Byleth blinked once, twice. Unclenching her hand, she finally acknowledged the slight stinging in her palm. She watched as a small rivulet of blood trailed down and almost absently tried to pull away when she realized it was heading downwards towards Rhea's hand. The older woman refused to let go, however, her soothing ministrations continuing and Byleth gave up without much of a fight.

She watched as the blood pooled slightly at the dip in her palm before sliding down her wrist. The sight of that pale hand coated in blood – her blood, nonetheless – made Byleth vaguely uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry," Byleth rasped quietly, then idly wondered when the last time was that she had anything to drink. "I didn't think it would be… it didn't feel right to remove the thorns. Not for these."

Rhea's free arm lightly squeezed her in a half embrace, while her chin settled comfortingly atop Byleth's shoulder. When she spoke, it was directly into a lightly pointed ear.

"Take the time you need, dearest. I did not intend to disturb you; however, I could not keep my distance when I noticed your shivers." Rhea soothed lowly. "If you would like to be alone, I can await you inside."

Byleth felt emotionally disconnected, almost numb. It was an odd feeling for her now, what with the sheer amount of _feelings_ Sothis' merge had unlocked within her. She did note, however absently, that Rhea's presence as well as the cloak now around her shoulders was slowly chasing away a chill she hadn't been fully aware of.

Byleth's free hand enveloped the larger one at her stomach, pressing it more firmly against her. A silent nod against her shoulder and a ghost of a kiss against her cheek made the warmth slowly suffusing her cold limbs grow.

Byleth eyed the bouquet in her hand once more. Twirled it. Noted the blood slowly seeping into the once pristine ribbon, the white flowing into crimson.

She spoke into the silence as she stared, transfixed, a tremor in her faint voice.

"I failed them."

_I failed her._

"No. No, Byleth, you did not." Rhea's embrace became a shade tighter, her use of Byleth's name instead of an endearment and the sharp edge to her voice both carefully calculated to garner the utmost attention. "Listen to me, my love. The path you took was hard, but selfless. You were able to save so many people – to bring peace to a world gone mad. It was she who failed you."

Byleth opened her mouth to argue, but the words dissolved and all that came out was a small puff of displaced air. Rhea sounded so certain of her words. Still, she wasn't sure if she could bring herself to truly believe them. There was one thing she was certain of, however, and this she suddenly decided to share.

"Once upon a time, someone very dear to my heart told me… She told me…" Byleth's hand released Rhea's and settled above her heart, pressing lightly against the skin. A phantom warmth pulsed in response, and Byleth was able to take a calming breath, her mind ever so slightly clearer. "_Whatever comes to pass, please swear to cut a path that is your own_."

"She sounds like a wise woman," Rhea agreed quietly, only to start at the sudden chuckle that shook Byleth's frame. "Am I wrong?"

"I'm sorry," Byleth cleared her throat and subtly rubbed her eyes. "I don't know why I did that. Yes, she was - _is_ – wise, but also demanding. And could be, at times, a little terror. She did however give great advice - and has saved both my life and sanity more than once over the years."

Before Rhea could respond - before the conversation could be derailed completely into reminiscing about the woman who had impacted both of their lives so thoroughly - there was one matter that Byleth suddenly felt the need to clear up.

"But you are also wrong. I'm not selfless – far from it, in fact." Byleth's small smile turned despondent as her gaze came to rest once more on the bouquet in her hand.

"Though I hate to argue with you, dear one, I find that quite hard to believe and really must insist that you are wrong." Rhea's brow furrowed further in confusion when Byleth immediately shook her head.

"No, I am." Byleth's voice carried with it a tired sort of certainty, the kind born from hours upon hours of reflection. With a sigh, she rubbed her thumb over a stem, not even blinking as her skin ran over a hidden thorn.

"When the war was finally over, there were many things I wondered. Asked myself. But chief among them was - could I do better a second time?" Byleth's words came slowly, her voice quiet enough that only Rhea's proximity and enhanced hearing allowed her to hear them. "Could I save this person, or change this person's mind? Stop this event from happening altogether? Stop the war before it began?"

Byleth paused to gather her thoughts, and in the back of her mind she was thankful that Rhea had decided to stay quiet until she finished. She felt like the words had to be said, had to be shared – but if she were interrupted, she doubted that she'd have the courage to continue.

"I've found myself thinking about it a lot - in fact any time my mind has been left to wander it is inevitably drawn back to the same haunting questions. So, like I have been trained to my whole life, I decided to tackle the questions as a tactician. Memories were picked apart, battles planned and re-planned, conversations I both had and didn't have sifted through…" Byleth's voice trailed off for a long moment. "And this morning I finally came to a… satisfactory answer to my questions."

Byleth gazed at the roses, their petals a dark crimson. _Mourning_. Her gaze then shifted almost jerkily to the single purple hyacinth in the middle. _Sorrow_. _Forgiveness_. _Regret_.

Byleth's voice was a whisper on the wind.

"…_Maybe_."

Rhea allowed the silence to linger between them. The sun had fully set, stars twinkling merrily in the clear sky when she finally spoke, having waited until she was certain that the incredibly strong yet infinitely fragile woman in her arms was done speaking.

"I still fail to understand how that makes you selfish, my love." Rhea sighed softly, shifting until both arms were wrapped around a small waist.

"Because… Because for all that I could change should I go back, the risk is far too great." Byleth finally spoke the words out loud and the weight that had been bearing down upon her since the war began lessened. It was not gone completely – perhaps it never would be - but Byleth felt like she could breathe just that much easier.

A gust of wind pulled at two differing shades of green, causing the strands of hair to swirl together until they became intertwined. Byleth's hand suddenly opened, the bouquet of flowers flowing into the air for a moment before their weight became too much for the wind. Green eyes watched as the flowers sank, and when they reached a darkness even the moon did not illuminate Byleth said one last silent goodbye.

"…Are you cold? We should head inside." Byleth spoke finally, gently patting the arms around her waist.

Another gust of wind swept around them as Rhea released Byleth and stepped back, the chill swiftly draining what heat their bodies had produced together. Hands clasped, they made their way back to the archbishop's chambers without being waylaid by any of the many people hoping for an audience with either woman.

Byleth silently noted, however, more than one instance of someone being headed off by Shamir or stopped intimidatingly by Catherine. She was even amused to see that a mere corridor away from their chambers a rather persistent follower was suddenly drawn into a conversation by an innocently smiling Flayn, Seteth as always a few feet behind her and glowering rather menacingly at the suddenly nervous knight.

Byleth feigned ignorance through it all, though the warm feeling in her chest grew, her heart that much lighter at the quiet support shown by her friends.

Entering their chambers, Rhea silently lead Byleth over to the small table by the window and had her sit before bustling away to the attached bathing room. Byleth set the basket, much lighter than when she'd filled it that morning, on the floor by her feet before shrugging out of her cloak. She had just finished unbuckling and discarding her bracers when Rhea reappeared, the older woman setting a bowl of warm water on the table beside them.

Rhea pulled the adjacent chair closer, their knees bumping before Byleth shifted enough to allow them to slot together comfortably. Soaking a cloth before wringing out the excess water, Rhea pulled Byleth's hand into her lap and softly began to dab at the dried blood.

Suddenly self-conscious at just how many little cuts she had beneath the mess of blood, and just how intently yet gently Rhea went about cleaning them, Byleth squirmed slightly. "…Sorry."

"There is no need to apologise, my love." Rhea smiled warmly though she kept her attention focused on her task. Finishing up the skin itself, she made sure to clean any trace of blood from the solitary ring adorning Byleth's finger. Only once the ring gleamed silver and green once more did she place the cloth back in the bowl. "Though I do not relish seeing you hurt, I will always be here to heal what wounds I can."

Tracing the marred skin, damp fingers glowed with a green light. A soothing warmth made Byleth's hand tingle, and though the light faded the fingers continued. Byleth watched, breath caught in her throat as Rhea looked up and that warm inviting smile was finally within full view.

Words tore themselves from Byleth's chest, tumbling from her lips in a rush as though afraid she'd clamp them once more behind sharp teeth.

"We were so, _so_ close to losing you. We all hoped, of course, but I could see it in their faces, hear it in their voices. They held fast to hope because the alternative was unthinkable, but…" Byleth blinked, surprised as a drop of wetness dripped onto her cheek. She barely had time to register the feeling before a soft thumb was wiping it away. Rhea's smile had faded into a concerned frown, and Byleth silently cursed herself for causing it.

Clearing her throat, Byleth's gaze lowered. Her voice was thick with poorly suppressed emotion. "I almost lost you. And a world without…" Byleth's words trailed off as her gaze caught on the basket at her feet.

Reaching down suddenly, she pulled out the last of the flowers. The stems were thin and topped with bunches of small, delicate looking blooms the color of light purple. By far the largest bouquet she had put together that day, they were held together with a mint green ribbon. Unlike the others, however, this one had a small card attached to the ribbon.

Inscribed upon the card in Byleth's looping scrawl were two words.

Byleth silently handed the bouquet over to Rhea, gnawing absently at her lip as the other woman gazed at them with a small smile, obviously confused at the sudden gift.

"They are lovely, thank you." Rhea brought the flowers up to her face and took a delicate sniff, pleased at the light scent. Just as she was about to place them on the table, her hand bumped the stiff card. Twisting it around, she read the words and paused, before reading them again. For a long moment she gazed at the words silently before tracing them almost reverently with a shaking finger.

_Eternal love_.

Byleth waited until bright green eyes met her own before she spoke, her words raw and honest, gaze all but pleading with the older woman to _understand_.

"I can't risk it." Byleth's voice was as earnest as she could make it, and she didn't miss the slight moisture coating green eyes in an otherworldly sheen as understanding finally bloomed. "I could change so much; make things better or make things worse. But no matter the good I _could_ do - I just can't risk losing you."

"So, as you can see, I _am_ selfish…"

Byleth trailed off as a light, watery laugh fell from Rhea's lips.

"My Byleth," Rhea breathed. The flowers were neatly placed on the table before soft hands trailed up and cupped lightly flushed cheeks. Leaning forward, Rhea brushed their lips together softly while murmuring. "My dear, sweet Byleth."

Byleth's eyes fluttered shut as Rhea finally sealed their lips together properly with a gentle pressure. A finger brushing delicately against a pointed ear caused Byleth to shiver and purr as she instinctively pressed closer. Despite her actions, however, Rhea's fingers trailed back down to the relatively safer position of cupping her cheek, wanting to keep the embrace soft and sweet.

When their mouths finally drifted apart after long minutes of simply feeling each other's warmth, Byleth was only slightly surprised to find that she was no longer sitting in her own chair but instead situated comfortably on Rhea's lap and ensconced safely within her warm embrace.

Rhea sighed happily, face nuzzling gently against Byleth's as she murmured. "You are aware, I believe, that the… strength - for a lack of a better word – of my emotions differs from those of a human. This is true for all with a lifespan akin to my own, though I have found that it differs somewhat on an individual basis. Though it is an ugly thing to say, my hatred runs deep, and grudges are long-lasting and only rarely forgiven – though never forgotten."

"My love…" Rhea paused briefly to brush a warm kiss against Byleth's jaw, her next words spoken directly into an ear so as not to be misheard. "My love is deeper still, and all-consuming - as is my devotion. There is _nothing_ I would not do for the sake of those I love."

Rhea pulled back slightly, brushing a soft kiss against a cheek. Once. Twice. Just as she was going for a third, Byleth leaned in and captured her lips. This kiss was deeper than the others, though still retaining its softness as its intent was an expression of love, not passion.

Pulling back suddenly, Byleth gazed seriously into Rhea's eyes. Her words were firm, unwavering, with not a single shred of doubt audible in her voice.

"I love you."

As she did each time Byleth spoke those three profound words, Rhea's eyes fluttered and she paused, the pink hue suffusing her cheeks spreading slightly. As if she had to take a moment to reassure herself that she wasn't dreaming. A warm smile, resplendent in its genuineness, swiftly made its home upon her lips.

And Byleth's breath caught, as it always did – as she believed it always _would_ \- at the sight.

"And I love you, my Byleth," Rhea murmured, eyes shining with emotion. "Truly, deeply, unequivocally. _Eternally_."

**0o0o0o0**


End file.
